Hot Pockets Heiress In Hot Water

Hot Pockets Heiress In Hot Water


LET’S GET RIGHT INTO IT. AS YOU KNOW, TONIGHT WAS THE
TENTH DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE. AND IT WAS HOSTED RIGHT HERE
ON THIS NETWORK, CBS. WHICH EXPLAINS WHY BERNIE
SANDERS ANSWERED EVERY QUESTION WITH, “BAZINGA.” ( LAUGHTER )
THIS NETWORK HOSTED THE LATEST DEBATE. THAT MEANS CBS IS NOW HOME TO
BOTH “THE AMAZING RACE” AND “THE REALLY LONG, ANNOYING RACE.” ( LAUGHTER )
CBS IS, OF COURSE, ALSO HOME TO THE LONG-RUNNING SOAP OPERA
“THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL.” AND IN AN EFFORT TO DRAW IN
THOSE VIEWERS, HERE’S HOW THEY PROMOTED TONIGHT’S DEBATE. “THE OLD AND THE BUTTIGIEG.” ( LAUGHTER )
LAST WEEK’S DEBATE HAD SIX PEOPLE ONSTAGE, BUT THERE WERE
SEVEN TONIGHT, BECAUSE LONG-SHOT BILLIONAIRE, TOM STEYER, WAS A
LAST-MINUTE QUALIFIER. SO THERE YOU HAVE IT. SIX PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES AND
TOM STEYER. ( LAUGHTER )
TOM STEYER IS THE GUY AT THE PARTY WHO BUSTS THROUGH THE
DOOR AND IS LIKE, “I’M BACK, BITCHES!”
( LAUGHTER ) AND EVERYONE’S LIKE
“OH, I DIDN’T REALIZE YOU’D LEFT.” ( LAUGHTER )
MOVING ON, MORE FALLOUT FROM THE BIG USC COLLEGE
ADMISSIONS SCANDAL. AN HEIRESS FROM THE FAMILY THAT
INVENTED THE MICROWAVABLE SNACK HOT POCKETS, WAS SENTENCED TODAY
FOR BRIBING HER DAUGHTERS’ WAY INTO COLLEGE. HER FAMILY CREATED HOT POCKETS
AND NOW SHE MIGHT GO TO PRISON. SO AT LEAST THE FOOD WILL BE AN
UPGRADE. ( LAUGHTER )
SHE’S THE HEIRESS TO THE HOT POCKETS FORTUNE. WHICH IS A STRANGE PHRASE. AS A GENERAL RULE, THE WORD
“HEIRESS” SHOULD NEVER BE USED IN CONNECTION WITH SOMETHING
THAT COMES IN A FLAVOR CALLED “BARBECUE RECIPE BEEF.” ( LAUGHTER )
TODAY, THE WOMAN WAS SENTENCED TO FIVE MONTHS IN JAIL, WHICH
WAS DISAPPOINTING, BECAUSE SHE ORIGINALLY ENTERED A PLEA OF–
♪ NOT GUILTY ♪ ( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND FINALLY, THERE’S A NEW
HEALTH STUDY WE WANTED TO TELL YOU ABOUT. ACCORDING TO RESEARCHERS AT
HARVARD UNIVERSITY, MEN WHO EAT JUNK FOOD ARE MORE LIKELY TO
HAVE LOW SPERM COUNT.>>WHOO! ( LAUGHTER )
>>James: THAT’S — ( LAUGHTER )
THAT’S THE STRANGEST RESPONSE. ( LAUGHTER )
WHO DID THAT? WHO WAS IT? ( LAUGHTER )
I CAN’T WORK OUT — ARE YOU SAYING —
>>I DON’T WANT ANY KIDS!>>James: YOU DON’T WANT ANY
KIDS! ( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>>James: THAT IS RIDICULOUS,
MAN. ( LAUGHTER )
>>WHOO!>>James: MEN WHO EAT JUNK
FOOD ARE MORE LIKELY TO HAVE LOW SPERM COUNTS. HAVEN’T THE PEOPLE AT
HOT POCKETS DONE ENOUGH DAMAGE ALREADY? ( LAUGHTER )
IN LIGHT OF THIS NEW REPORT, SOME COMPANIES HAVE EVEN BEEN
FORCED TO RENAME PRODUCTS THAT COULD LOWER SPERM COUNT. I SAW THIS CANDY BAR ON THE
SHELF TODAY. “NO BABY RUTH.” ( LAUGHTER )
MEN WHO EAT FAST FOOD EXPERIENCE A DROP IN FERTILITY. AND YET, SOMEHOW, THIS GUY HAS
FIVE CHILDREN. ( LAUGHTER )
REGGIE, ARE YOU READY?

100 thoughts to “Hot Pockets Heiress In Hot Water”

  1. Who’s Been A HUGE Fan Before
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    *pewdiepie Commented on my latest video I’m literally crying and shaking *😝😭

  2. I have a hot pocket who requested me on two of my videos if I can use the pedal footwork on the piano while playing… So annoying hot pocket 💩

  3. IM VERY MUCH FOR THIS KIND OF FUNNY,MONEY BUSINESS.IT NEEDS TO BE PLAY TO DIEING HOSP.ROOMS.IT TAKES THERE MIND OFF DIEING.

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  5. Loool, little known fact, Steyer is my stepmom's old boss. She was there when the company was in its first couple of years (actually, I'd need to fact check that w her but she was definitely there when the company only occupied a single floor, like in a company building). Interesting that now he's a presidential candidate…

  6. Friends, hi I'm a musician from Russia.And I will be very happy if you rate the video for the song on my YouTube channel ,, you Know, Natasha,,) all the best;))

  7. Que la paix soit sur vous, je suis Oussama du Maroc. Ma chaîne est spécialisée dans les jeux de divertissement. J'ai 18 ans, je suis marocain. J'achète ma médecine de mère avec elle et achète mes affaires et fournitures scolaires. Je serai la personne la plus heureuse du monde.

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